"being myself is a weakness,looking to myself is a shame,knowing myself is a failure.."

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Sunday, 20 April 2014

serba salah..hmm

Salam n hi sume..pekabar?hrp2 sehat la yer..amin..

sblm ak mulakn post ni,ak nk pomot lagu yg korg dgr kt blog ak ni...ak br je tuka..tjuk nya:Buatku di Sana...mula2 1st time dgr,mcm xbest sgt...yela,besany genre lgu2 ak yg slow2 n melankolik..haha..tp,1 day ad org pomot lgu ni kt ak..ble dgr 2-3 kli,br r perasan,lirik dia sgt pnuh makna..try r dgr..hehe..

ok,back to d post..hmm..kli ni nk citer psl perasaan 'serba slh'..bkn 'bersalah' yer..hee..rseny sume org akn ad perasaan cmni...btul x?depends pd ap yg kte dh pnah wat la..hmm..

my story kli ni ialah ttg rse serba slh pd s/one yg ajk utk berjmpe...dlm diri ni rse serba slh nk jmpe dia..hmm...citerny gini:..
1 day tgh kje,ak dpt call dr s/one..ak pon t'kjut gak ble dia tbe2 call ak time kje..saluny dia akn call mlm..tp,bkn la tiap2 hr..dia pon ad jadual utk call skandal2 n ex2 bf dia..muahahahaa...mklum la,rmai sgt peminat..kah kah kah...so d unscheduled call tu happen..hmm.tbe2 dia ckp (lbh kurg): "ko nk jmpe ak x?"...perh...terkjut gak ak time tu..hmm...dgn selambanya ak jwb: "segan la wei nk jmpe ko...haha".....dia tany gak,npe xnk jmpe..ak pon jwb la: "ko tu ensem sgt,segan la nk jmpe...."hahahhaha..bengong plak jwpn ak tu...hahaaha
tp,siyes dow,mmg nk gak la jmpe dia..tp,segan woo..huhu...klo korg tgk muka dia..konfom meleleh2..muahahha..gurau je wei..haha..

hmm..cume ak terpikir,npe tbe2 dia call ak time tu..mcm ad s/ting yg dia nk ckp..hmm..dia tgh stress ke,ad probs ke..ak pon xtau..adeh..serba slh ak kt dia..he heard my story tp,ak plak wat maen2 jer time tu..huhu..adeh...feel bad plak..bkn ap wei,time tu tgh kje sbnrny n x expect dia akn call ak time tu..ap la agkny yer..buang tebiat ke ap ke..muahaha...

hmm..klo korg bce blog ak ni dr awal,korg msti ingt ak ni 'nakal' sgt..hahha..klo g mne2 je msti nk usha2 mamat ensem..tp sbnrny,segan dow..xberani nk tgur org2 tepi jln..nk senyum2 mmg x la..haha...yela,ak ni xensem wei..tmbah2 ad penyakit plak..hmm..sbb tu la kot ak tkot tnk jmpe dia..dan dia pon tau ak sakit...klo sblm ak sakit dia ajk jmpe,mgkin ak akn trus stuju nk jmpe dia..hahaa..tp,skrg dh laen...ak tkot klo lps ktorg jmpe,dia pon akn 'hilang' mcm most people did to me..hmm..klo dlu,mgkin ak akn sng nk move on...tp,klo kli ni,ssh la nk move on..coz,ak mmg dh xbpe cr kwn2 plu dh skrg...in fact,ak ngaku trus yg ak ad hiv ble dorg add fb or chat dgn ak..hmm..coz,ak xnk bg pape hrpn pd dorg..dan ak xnk la m'hrp pape dr dorg..especially si dia tu..kang ak jtuh cinta btul2 kt dia kang,ssh nti..haha..haih..ssh nk bg org fhm citer ni..haha..pndai2 la korg fhm yer..muahaha

now,ak mcm nyesal lak sbb bg alasan cmtu kt dia...hmm..psni,klo dia ajk jmpe lg, insyaAllah ak akn kumpul kekuatan utk jmpe dia...dan sejujurny ak ckp: I am not perfect as he is on my eyes....hmm...

up till today, i m thanking him a lot sbb s/times dia bg ak tersenyum ble dia msj ak..haha..dan mgkin ad hikmah ny ble Allah memperkenalkn aku dgn s/one yg baek cmni di saat2 ak berjuang utk m'hbskn sisa2 idup ak ni...alhamdulillah..

:)